Here.
Ready?
Just a moment!
My tummy's acting up again.
You should eat better.
Go find a toilet.
I'm okay now.
Here goes.
That's funny.
It's not plugged in yet.
Well, come on.
Yipee!
We did it! We did it!
Pipe down.
Oh...
All right, Ms. Wakako. It's time.
Yes.
My life's bill has come due.
In the name of the pharaoh, please enter your date of birth and gender.
Very well. Your future partner in life will be this gentleman.
Ms. Wakako.
Yes.
Huh!?
So, what's he like?
Eh!?
Ms. Wakako's case aside...
I soon found myself obsessed with antiques.
While I'm sure many items carry historical value...
I'm more intrigued by those imbued with sentimental value.
What's one man's garbage is another man's treasure.
The thrill is detecting value in something that seems worthless.
Then watching it's value rise.
- Wait, I was first. - Hey...
Give that back!
It's all very strange and exciting.
- Stop it! - Get off!
Let go! Give it back.
Stop!
So I decided to show Mr. Light Bulb my most prized possession.
What's this?
A bent nail.
A "bent nail"?
It's a great nail!
Right?
Remarkable!
The degree of rust, the arc of it's bend.
It's the best I've seen!
You understand!?
No, wait.
It's an ideal specimen.
I'm so glad you agree.
I'll give you 1,000 yen for it.
No! It's my prized possession. It's not for sale!
- 10,000 yen! - Ah, sold.
Just kidding.
What's that?
You should open a shop.
Pardon?
You may have "the gift".
Follow me.
We went to a mountain temple.
To appraise an heirloom of some kind.
What is it?
A water sprite.
What?
Mummified water sprite, to be exact.
Oh, come on!
Without a doubt. Please examine it.
Certainly.
Excuse me.
Yes? Oh, hello! Yes, yes, of course...
I see.
My profession?
Excuse me.
Hello?
I'm a "soryo," a monk.
That's right, I said "Soryo".
Soryo (Soryu) Aska Langley. (Neon Genesis Evangelion character)
- Oh, excuse the pun. - Water sprite?
I see them sometimes.
Most are fakes, made with turtle shells.
A real one fetches 30 million yen.
Don't be stupid.
If it is real, then maybe the one mother saw was...
It was nothing but a prank.
Scared you, though.
Well, of course!
It's strange how people really do "recoil" in fear.
Yes, it is. Can I put you down, now?
No!
Why not?
Hey...
What?
Did you ever marry?
Nope.
Why do you ask?
It's a secret.
Why you...!
Safe.
Shut up.
You know what, Mr. Light Bulb is an interesting guy.
I can see what you saw in him, Ma.
Hey, should I show him the letter and bring him here?
Maybe then you'll wake up.
Stop playing Sleeping Beauty!
Please lower your voice.
Oh... sorry.
So rude!
There's something I want to do, Ma.
Hmm?
You serious?
Dead serious.
A pawn shop?
Antiques.
I worry about your gradual erosion.
Well, don't!
What, has marriage made you stodgy?
So, how's married life?
We got divorced.
Oh my.
That was quick.
One month exactly.
How'd that happen?
Can I not say?
Oh gosh, I'm sorry.
That's okay.
Nothing a good night's sleep won't cure.
Here we are. An opinion leader in antique shops.
A lot of shops take their cues from this place.
"Artless"
Looks real chic.
It's charming.
Cute, huh?
Yeah.
- That's adorable. - So cute!
20,000 yen!
Bit expensive, don't you think?
What'd you expect?
- Yeah, but for this? - You gotta admit it's cute.
Quiet, please.
Oh, sorry.
What's up with him?
Knock it off.
Oh, sorry.
Ow...
- Stop it. - It's my stomach.
Well, excuse me!
It was stylish, though.
That's what's annoying.
True.
Which is why I shouldn't launch a fashion magazine.
What's wrong?
I gave pause.
Why did I work for that publisher in the first place?
I hope it fails, and everyone goes home!
Ho-hum. I think I've failed in life.
What's wrong?
Things just haven't been going well.
Maybe I'll join a cult.
No, that's not me.
Hey, Ichinose! Heard anything interesting lately?
- I have. - What?
Remember Ms. Tachibana?
Yeah, how is she?
- She's in Italy right now. - Really?
She was chosen for that new European magazine project.
She was, huh?
Shocked?
Not at all.
What's more, she's living with Amaya the photographer, in Milan.
Huh?
Right now, I've got a million yen in savings.
Right!
Well, no use just dragging my feet. Time to go all out!
Look out! Here I come!
A branch office shouldn't be punished for headquarter's poor accounting.
It's just not fair.
Whoa!
Ah, I'm overdoing it.
Uh, no, it's nothing.
You still there? No, I'm not crying. Why would I cry?
So I threw half my savings into opening a small antique shop of my own.
No more gradual erosion for me. But I still had one problem.
Welcome.
Shall we go?
No sales whatsoever.
"Let's take a souvenir picture of today!!"
Ho-hum...
The back sliding returns.
Hey, what's up?
Absolutely nothing.
Nothing at all?
Yep. No tension, no excitement, nothing.
- Want some advice? - Sure.
Open up your water faucet.
What do you mean?
Come here.
Huh?
Right! Let's buy a soda.
Eh? But it'll overflow!
That's the thrill!
Hang on...
Wait!
Hurry!
There it is! Go! Go!
Hurry up! There's no time to lose!
- What'll you have? - Erm, that!
And you?
Not soda!
Ah!! Tea!
Got it! Right, let's go!
Hurry!
Oh, crap!
Safe!
I almost peed my pants! Oh, my nerves!
- See? - Such a thrill just from buying a soda!
Okay, next!
Now I get you.
Full blast?
Full blast!
Good!
Let's eat lunch!
Right you are!
- Excuse me! - Yes, what'll it be?
- Chukadon! - Sure.
- Chili shrimp. - Okay...
Don't order that!
Why not?
Takes too long! Listen, with mine, the vegetables are already prepared.
And you just throw it on rice.
But with shrimp, they have to deep-fry... aaah!
Thank you!
Bad choice!
- But I wanted it. - Hurry!
Argh!! Out of the way!
Too late?
Safe!
Oh, my nerves are shot!
- What're you doing? - Ah, I'm worn out!
Wow, amazing tension!
- The faucet thing's incredible! - Isn't it!
You lost me. Anyways, how's your shop?
It's the absolute pits!
'Cause it lacks character!
It doesn't! It's stylish unlike this musty old fleabag!
You need targeted merchandise! Not just anything will do!
I sell white elephants!
Copycat.
That won't work!
What will then!?
Think!
I got it!
What!?
Black things!
But that's copycat, too!
I'll try it!
So I blew the rest of my savings on cute, black things.
- This is really cute, isn't it? - Yes.
I'll take it please.
Thank you. That'll be 2,000 yen.
Thank you.
Yes!
Excuse me, can I get through.
Haname!
- Ichinose! - Excuse me, sorry.
Can I squeeze by? Thanks.
Wow! This place is booming!
- Thanks to your article. - Ah, it was nothing.
It's alright, you can be yourself here.
Wow, time for new procurement!
No, no, metrically speaking, the economy's still on the decline.
Exactly, we need to make downward revisions.
- Whoah! - Oh yeah!!
You betcha!
No, it's nothing.
You know what, let's put those revisions on hold for a bit.
Hi!
Hey!
What?
Eh?
You called me here, remember?
Strike!
How's business?
Thriving. I recouped my investment.
That's great. How much was that?
About a million yen.
Wow.
Actually, I wanted to talk to you about something, Light Bulb.
Me, too.
Rock, paper, scissors!
Me first.
Dang.
Look, I've decided to close the shop.
What!? Why?
It's time.
I'm a roamer. I've stayed in one place too long.
I see.
I hate that flag-raising.
They can't time it with the music.
See? Too slow!
Can't they adjust it halfway up?
I don't want my life to be like that. It's time.
I see. So, when?
Tomorrow.
- Come on? - No, really.
You can't close shop that quickly.
Never underestimate the antique network. They're predatory.
What will you do?
Hit the road.
You're a distant relative, right?
Yeah.
This is a key to the Jinchoge family storehouse.
- Storehouse? - Yes, that's right.
What's in it?
An untold fortune. But I can't divulge.
- Why not? - 'Cause I don't know.
Well, what do you say?
I'll take it.
A million yen.
Eh!?
The bank will be closing shortly.
Thank you for your business today.
Hey.
Zip... whoosh.
Really?
Untold fortune, right?
Absolutely. I've done my share of swindling, but this is a mountain of treasure.
I'll hunt you down and beat you if you lie.
Okay.
Yo.
Hi.
What's this? Something up?
Nope, nothing.
I'm going to miss you.
You'd better.
Miss me? Not with Ms. Wakako around.
- No need to bring that up. - Excuse me?
Huh? You didn't tell her?
No, he didn't.
I was about to.
So speak.
He's gonna live with her.
Really?
Really.
That big act you staged paid off.
It wasn't a big act.
What big act?
The King Tut fortune telling machine. It wasn't buried.
It wasn't?
It was staged.
Why?
'Cause Light Bulb fell for Ms. Wakako.
I happened upon the machine a while ago.
We planted the photo, got everything ready. Made it seem like we had just found it.
And bingo!
Hold it right there!
Don't tell her. I want to be her man of destiny.
Come on... so that emotional discovery was all a fix?
Of course. You think a 20-year-old machine would work?
You two are... scum.
Why?
Now I can't believe anything!
Then here. Take this back.
Keep it!
I'm just... so disappointed!
Watch it!
Shut up! Shut up, shut up, shut up!
Excuse me...
Yes?
Is this nail for sale?
Erm...
- There's no price tag. - Uh, no.
It's beautiful isn't it?
300 yen.
I'll take it.
Thank you.
This makes me so happy.
Me, too.
Thanks.
Here.
- Thank you. - You too.
Wait...
Yes?
Uh, nothing. Thank you.
No, wait.
It's an ideal specimen.
Door key...
Got it.
I wonder why I never called him Dad,
knowing I might never see him again.
I shouldn't have been so stubborn.
Not believing in ghosts, or things I can't confirm with my own eyes.
It's ultimately stubbornness.
That's it, the weight of my stubbornness is what's dragging me into the swamp.
It was a surprisingly big store.
He's gone, huh?
Did I mess things up?
What do you mean?
By opening my big mouth.
Oh, that. Maybe.
He told me to apologize to you for him.
That, too, is pathetic.
And say thanks for the dough.
Worse than pathetic. Selfish, right?
Yeah, sure is.
Ultra-super special ultimate selfish, right?
No doubt.
Read this.
It's a letter my mom wrote to Mr. Light Bulb.
What?
Eh!?
This is pure anarchy!
It sure is.
Now what?
Nothing.
This.
Oh, that.
Well, I might as well see if the key is genuine or not.
If it is a key to a storehouse, then it should contain a lot of stuff.
Maybe no gold, but perhaps one good little find worth a million yen or so.
Hurry up.
I'm hurrying.
Get a move on.
I'm hungry.
Live with it.
Ah! Over there! Come on!
This it?
I'm sure of it.
Hey, it's sealed.
You think it might be cursed or something?
That was quick.
That leaves...
this.
It opened!
Light Bulb was telling the truth!
Ah...
Eh?
Hey... Are you all right?
What's all this?
Dirt?
What!?
Just dirt? Thanks a lot!
He deceived you?
Yeah, he did. That jerk!
I'll kill him!
Ah!
Argh!!!
Ti-hya-mo-chai.
You okay?
Give it up. He duped you.
No. There's a reason for this dirt.
Like what?
Ah! Maybe there's gold dust mixed in here.
Maybe we just didn't notice. But it's there.
Then be my guest.
Why fill this thing with dirt, and then seal the place up?
Help me, please.
You were duped.
At least till the sun dips behind those hills.
Just till the sun goes down!
Forget about it.
Are you asleep?
Hey, Mr. Gas?
What?
What if that dirt itself is some kind of valuable resource.
Like plutonium...
Nope.
Yeah, you're right.
Sorry. Your trying to sleep?
Yeah.
You think the dirt contains special powers?
Ah! Like for growing huge plants.
Nope.
- What if...? - Nope!
- How about...? - Just forget it.
I know but...
He deceived you, after all.
I don't think he was trying to "deceive" me. It just turned out that way.
Excuse me.
Can I clear your plates?
Yes, thank you.
Thank you.
Was there no hot water in the thermos?
Oh, no, I like it this way.
Oh...
What is that?
Milo sludge.
"Milo sludge"?
Very amusing.
It must be like eating mud or something.
Her father likes it, too.
You don't say.
Ah!!!
I got it! I got it! I got it!
Got what?
What the dirt is!
Hey, Gas! What do you think this is?
Dirt.
Absolutely not!
This here is...
instant swamp!
That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard.
This is swamp mud converted to dirt.
You're nuts.
Add water to this... and you get a swamp!
Spare me, please. I've come this far.
"This far"? Have you any idea where you are?
Mt. Fuji's 5th stage? 9th stage? Who knows?
God help me.
There was indeed a swamp here.
See? What'd I tell you?
So what?
This map is from the Edo period, early 1700's.
Hey, yeah. This swamp is gone, right?
That's right.
Right?
So what?
So if we move forward a little more in time...
Ah, things weren't easy.
No, they weren't.
Not in the Edo Period.
Right?
Right.
Oh, the native people's festival temple.
Native people's festival.
I'm guessing you like this kind of stuff, eh Miss?
Don't be so lewd.
She does.
Quiet!
Ah, finally! Look here!
This is a Tempo period village map. No swamp here.
Just an open field, like today.
"Year of Tempo 8, June 6" - Ah, this is it!
Bingo!
Hooray.
This is the swamp.
Right! I'm taking it home.
Are you serious?
Of course. This is my swamp!
The swamp I brought for a million yen.
How do we do this?
Parcel postage?
Oh, box it up, fill out slips.
Hey!
You're strange.
Come on, Gas. You can drive a truck, right?
Look, just forget it, all right?
No, I'm definitely taking it.
Be rational.
Don't talk to me about rational, punk rocker!
Say what?
You're a punk rocker!
You're supposed to be irrational! So be irrational!
Shut up!
Fine! Who needs you!?
Go home! You jerk!
What's with her, anyway?
It's a sand quarry. High quality mountain dirt.
Why am I so gung-ho about this?
Is it just anger at my father? Or added anger at Gas?
At any rate, it's going home. I don't care, I'm sending it all.
One, two...
Ah! Give me a break!
Poop!
Come on.
Come on! Come on!
Parcel collection service!
You're an okay guy, really. Not cut out for Punk, perhaps?
Quit your yapping. Anyhow, what're you going to do with all this?
Return it to it's real state.
Then what?
I'll feel good.
Like father, like daughter.
Excuse me?
Just like Light Bulb.
Hardly.
Ultra-super special ultimate selfish.
Here! My mom's place.
Keep it coming!
I'm dumping.
Please.
Oh, watch out!
Wow.
Over here, please!
What now?
Come on.
Here goes!
Ready?
- I suppose. - Spread it to there.
From about here to there.
Okay, spread! Get to it.
Let's do this!
Ugh.
Come on. Get a move on!
I am.
So much to do!
It's very swamp-like.
That's nice.
Right! Now for water!
Isn't that enough?
What? After all this work, you don't want to see it become a swamp?
It's like instant noodles without hot water!
Is it?
Yes, it is.
So, where do we get water?
How should I know?
- Mineral water? - That'll take forever!
Ah! I know!
What?
Remember what that jerk Light Bulb said?
Not again.
Open up the faucet full blast.
Yes, yes, yes!
Huh?
Oops.
Hey! Couldn't you hold it down?
Do I have to?
Instead of spacing out.
You do it.
Now what?
Hey, cut that out!
Stay alert.
Boomdiada, boomdiada. Boomdiada, boomdiada.
- What're you singing? - Mountain song.
Boomdiada, boomdiada. Boomdiada, boom....
Stop that.
Why?
It's depressing.
I said, knock it off!
Yes, sir...
Trade places?
No, I'm fine!
Good.
Gas! The swamp's done!
What?
Oh...
Instant swamp, huh?
What do you think?
Looks good.
It's swampier than I expected.
You see? It's a pretty good looking swamp.
Yeah.
Not that it means anything.
Yeah, I second that.
What next?
Clean it up, I guess.
Leave it. It'll dry on its own.
True.
What's up?
I don't know. I just thought it would be kind of special, but...
it's no big deal.
The fact that you made it, I guess, is pretty special.
That's pretty cool.
Shall I turn off the water?
No, that's okay. I'll go myself.
Thanks for everything.
Don't sweat it.
Sorry I dragged you into this.
That's okay. Besides it had its fun moments.
Really? It was fun?
Yeah, it was.
- Say, Gas? - Yeah?
I... I mean, you...
Huh?
- Hmm? - Eh!?
What the...?
Ow ow ow! It's real! It's real.
Wait!
Hang on!
Ti-hya-mo-chai.
What was that?
The swamp king?
It looked like...
a dragon?
Not a dragon.
But you saw it, right?
Yeah, I did.
Well, I saw it, too. A dragon.
Hey!? I saw a dragon! For the very first time!
Me, too!
Yes!!
What's this?
Oh crap!
Ah!
Oh my...!
Argh!!
Enough!
Ah, I've had it!
Oh!?
Hey! Get out here.
What are you hollering about?
Dragon! A flying dragon!
Don't be silly.
No, it's true. A dragon!
Stop daydreaming, and earn us some money.
But it's a dragon!
We can't eat a dragon!
That would be taboo!
You tick me off.
Anger makes me hungry. You charlatan!
Oh!
Rope 'em in!
Morning.
- About time you got up. - Lassoes in front of Gotanda station!!
You were the one in a coma all this time.
Ah, nasty tongue.
A lot happened while you were asleep.
- Like what? - I'm not telling.
Why not?
Anyways, just don't do anything stupid again.
Stupid?
Why'd you go water sprite fishing?
'Cause you didn't believe me.
Know how much trouble that caused?
Sometimes you've got to find out something, whatever the cost.
I'd like to sink you in a swamp myself.
But you were saved. All's well that ends well.
You betcha.
Listen, I know you'll have trouble believing this but...
I was saved by a dragon.
- What? - I was sinking into a dark hole...
when a large dragon flew overhead and grabbed me with his big paw.
And I suddenly awoke...
inside a large plastic tent. Am I a melon? I thought.
So that dragon was real, after all.
Huh? What did you say?
What?
- You believe? - Why?
Since when did you start to believe?
Who cares when?
Huh? What's in the box?
A water sprite.
I caught it this morning to show you.
Come on.
Hey, is this Gonzaburo?
A man from the rabbit farm delivered it.
How did he know?
"The clue was on the bottom of his feet."
"Let's take a souvenir picture of today!!"
No wonder.
Now that's the impossible.
Gonzaburo.
Gonzaburo!
Right?
- Sorry. - You're late.
Ah, thanks.
Until I could get my antique store up and running again...
I decided to help Gas with his work.
"Gasu Electric Works Co." - Excuse me.
Okay.
Careful of the high voltage wires.
Roger! Gotcha!
I still don't know what emerged from that swamp.
But I think it was a dragon, after all.
No, I'm sure it was a dragon.
It's Amaya-kun!
- How about raw oysters? - Raw oysters?
But I've got food poisoning in the past from eating them.
How about lobsters, then?
Lobsters?
- Oh, a water sprite. - Look! What a cute house!
Come on.
- I'd love to live in a house like that. - Really?
Yeah.
Let's get started.
Yeah, let's.
It is a dragon.
Gas, do you know what we saw?
No, I don't.
Listen!
Most things in the world are insignificant.
Most people laugh way more than they cry.
And see unbelievable things.
But by the next morning, they've forgotten.
To them I say,
"Open up the faucet on the crusty lies and stubbornness hardening your lives..."
"and wash it all away!"
Kumiko Aso
Morio Kazama
Ryo Kase
Keiko Matsuzaka
Translated by Anthony Kim
Subtitle timing, editing and additions for this version by chochoc, famitsu1
Additional translation assistance from quaisnord, shinjuku
Special thanks to cologne69
Executive Producers Takeshi Kato, Fumio Samesima
Hirofumi Ogoshi, Akira Ishii
Presented by "Instant Numa" Film Partners
Unplugged Film Kadokawa Pictures
Pony Canyon Cinema Investment
Written and Directed by Satoshi Miki
The end.
2009 "Instant Swamp" Film Partners